When Big Behaviors Show Up, Pause Before You Pounce
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Hey Reader! It was snack time. Everyone was sitting at the table. Crackers were opened. Cups were poured. And then it happened. Pfffft. A child spit. The teacher froze. Her stomach tightened. Spitting is one of those behaviors. But instead of reacting, she did something different. She paused. And that pause changed everything. One Simple but Powerful TipPause and ask: What is this child trying to get or avoid? That pause matters. When we don’t pause:
When we do pause:
A Better Response to SpittingInstead of saying: “Stop that right now!” This teacher said: “You may not spit at the table. But you may spit in the trash can.” She handed the child a napkin. She pointed to the trash. The message was clear:
The child spit in the trash. Then again. Then one more time. And just like that… No big reaction from the teacher. No more reaction from other kids. Sensory need met. Why This Works Spitting often happens because a child wants:
By giving a replacement behavior, you:
Is it socially appropriate to spit at snack time? No! But allowing a child to spit in the trash can removes the “fun factor” in watching reactions from others and it meets the sensory need the child may have. Try This With Other Big BehaviorsInstead of only stopping the behavior, offer a replacement and see what happens:
The goal is not perfection. The goal is regulation. You’re Doing Holy WorkBig behaviors don’t mean you’re failing. Pause. You don’t have to fix everything – just take the next right step. And remember:
Cheering you on this week! -Your ECCN team P.S. If you don’t want to receive these weekly emails anymore, no hard feelings. Click HERE to be removed from this list. (You’ll still receive other emails from us based on past preferences.)
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